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Not Being Able To Achieve Peace In Life
Assalamualaikum Ghamidi sahab,
I have been suffering from Low Self Esteem/Worthlessness, mood disorder(Depression), have the habit to taking stress in day to day life since more than a decade.
On & off i have been taking Psychiatric medication since 10 years. It often happens that I can’t sleep until morning due my running thoughts & thus although inspite of being married, have to resort to Pornography & Masturbation in order to find some relaxation & peace(although after that there used to be guilt about the Sin & a thought would always trouble me “Isn’t Allah happy with me or I am sure that Allah must be disliking me because of this vicious cycle(Kya Allah mere se Raazi hai ?)”
Currently since the past 2 years due to some medication earlier I have lost Libido, this has although numbed my Depressive feelings also which is positive thing. But still for my stress & running thoughts I need to resort to Pornography & Masturbation(although it’s no longer an enjoyable act due to lost Libido) in order to find some relief.
How can I find Peace in Life, be less anxious & sleep relaxed. What should I feel about myself considering the above act of mine or vicious circle. I have been trying different medicines but there is no perfect one.
For my Non Muslim Psychologist or Psychiatrist Pornography & Masturbation is a very normal thing until it’s not becoming an addiction.
Since your organisation is an International one can you help to come in contact with any good Islamic Psychologist who can understand Science & Islam both & help me find solace in Life.
Wanted to Question this directly to Ghamidi sahab on 30th June live session but couldn’t.
Reverence
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