Sister, I’d like to share my thoughts based on what I’ve understood from Islam and from my own personal experiences.
Islam is very clear on this matter: two non-mahrams are not allowed to stay in contact with the intention of marrying someday in the future. If a young woman and a man are interested in each other, they may discuss the matter once ideally involving their parents—and agree to revisit it when the appropriate time comes. However, anything beyond that—such as maintaining a friendship or emotional connection is not permissible and often leads to sins, and in some cases, even zina.
I would especially emphasize that during youth, our feelings and thoughts are often immature and emotionally charged. We may think we understand love or compatibility, but often we don’t yet grasp the depth of the Islamic concept of marriage. Many young people fall into emotional attachments they later regret, or their feelings naturally change as they grow and mature.
In Islam, marriage should be for the sake of Allah alone and that’s why it’s considered half of our deen. A man should look for a woman who is best in her deen, and vice versa. From my own experience, I can say that real married life is very different from the way we imagine it in our younger years. There are many other important factors such as patience, emotional stability, financial responsibility, and mutual understanding that are not always present or understood at a young age.
Understanding the purpose of marriage through an Islamic way truly helps in navigating these emotions and making the right decisions.
JazakAllah Khair.May Allah guide us all to what is best and protect us from the traps of Shaytaan and Fiona.