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Blindly Relying On God
I rely on God for the smallest of things in my life. I apply for jobs and get rejected but believe that the opportunity ill get is what Allah wants me to get and when. Im 23, and ljke other men, also want to get married as soon as possible, but obviously when God wants me to. My question is, nowadays you can meet/talk to people on social media, in your class, marriage apps etc. This means we have alot of options or women we can talk to to get married, which further creates confusion. So, is it ok, if I just rely on Allah for the perfect timing and perfect individual that He will send into my life or like other things, I should keep trying as well? With me trying, it just gets very confusing and frustrating.
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4 Replies
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Blindly Relying On God
updated 3 weeks, 5 days ago
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In Islam, relying on Allah never meant waiting without movement. Tawakkul is not “Allah will do it, so I’ll stop trying,” and it’s also not “I must force outcomes myself.” It’s the middle: you act sincerely within your limits, and you let Allah decide the outcome and timing. The Prophet ﷺ explained this beautifully when he said, “Tie your camel, and then trust Allah.” The tying is your effort; the safety is Allah’s decision.Marriage works the same way. Allah does not usually “send” a person into someone’s life without any human steps being taken. He places opportunities, not guarantees. Meeting people through halal means—family, community, study, work, or even marriage platforms—is part of asbab (means). What Allah controls is which of those paths opens, which closes, and which turns out to be good for you. Confusion often comes when a person tries to explore every option at once, not when they try at all. Islam doesn’t require you to talk to many people; it allows you to move selectively and calmly, one step at a time.So yes, you should keep trying—but with boundaries. Trying doesn’t mean emotionally investing in multiple possibilities, overanalyzing, or forcing clarity before its time. It means doing what’s reasonable, then stepping back and letting Allah shape the result. If something becomes frustrating, overwhelming, or mentally exhausting, that’s often a sign to pause, not quit. Pausing is also an act of wisdom.About timing: Allah’s timing is not random, but it usually unfolds through your effort, not instead of it. Job rejections, delays in marriage, and closed doors are not signs that you should stop moving; they’re signs that this door isn’t yours, not that no door exists. At 23, you’re not late—you’re early in learning patience, discernment, and self-knowledge, all of which directly affect the quality of the marriage you’ll eventually have.In short:Rely on Allah fully — but don’t freeze.Try — but don’t chase every option.Make duʿā’ — and also take steps.What’s meant for you will not miss you, but it usually arrives through motion, not stillness
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@meowmeow Thankyou so much for your reply maam, really encouraging and informative. Just what I needed to hear. Just one question, you said that we should try or take steps; when it comes to finding jobs etc it makes sense, that you try applying everyday and wait. When it comes to marriage, how does one do that? I mean ive seen people talking to others on social media or marriage apps and then get married. I find these things very exhausting so neither am I on such apps nor do I randomly talk to people. Im just afraid that this way of living might just lead me to not finding anyone ever. So, as you mentioned relying on God, then why cant I think that I will get the perfect opportunity when Allah wants and I wont be able to ignore that opportunity then?
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I understand this fear, and it’s a very human one. Thinking too much about future decisions — especially marriage — often creates anxiety, because it feels like one wrong step could change everything. But marriage doesn’t work the same way as job applications, and Islam doesn’t require you to exhaust yourself trying every possible route. Taking steps does not mean forcing yourself into methods that drain you, like social media or apps, if they don’t suit your nature.
In our culture, families, elders, and people around us play a real role — and that is also a valid and dignified path. You can let your parents know you’re open to marriage, allow trusted elders to keep you in mind, and then live your life normally. You don’t have to constantly worry or chase outcomes. Delay does not mean denial, and not actively searching everywhere does not mean nothing will ever happen.
When you live fully in the present — working on yourself, growing emotionally, spiritually, and practically — you naturally open paths for the future. Many meaningful relationships, including marriages, begin through unexpected and ordinary encounters, just like friendships do. We meet people through life itself, not always through searching. What matters is staying open, not anxious.
So trust Allah, take steps that are within your comfort and limits, involve your family, and let life unfold. You don’t need to carry the past or constantly worry about the future — often, the right opportunity becomes clear when you are ready to receive it.(I made my best friend very unexpectedly on a anime streaming website. To us it was really a coincidence and to this day we are really good friends.
You really don’t need to do something extra just do whatever is in your control and limit.
Future is unpredictable if we start worrying about our future we’ll be in chronic stress. We can only prepare ourselves for it by living in present and keep growing.)
I hope this will help u
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@meowmeow Thankyou so much for the response, it was very helpful and reduced my overthinking. I’ll surely think about it more.
Thankyou once again and sorry for the late response:)
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