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  • Dysfunctional Marriage In This Case And The Solution?

    Posted by Deleted User 1191 on April 4, 2023 at 3:15 am

    A husband works in a far off place and usually comes to his parents’ house once in a month for few days. The husband is debt ridden & suffers from compulsive buying disorder ( he doesn’t accept it) and is not taking responsibility of his children and wife or his parents both emotionally and financially. (His parents however earn pension money so are able to sustain themselves financially).

    The wife got a job four years back and started to earn money. Since she lives in the house of his in-laws, the inlaws mistreat her and her children. The probable reason could be because her husband doesn’t contribute to the house of her in-laws where his wife stays.

    The wife also doesn’t contribute financially to her in-laws.

    This has led to a situation where the daughter in law and her in-laws usually quarrel and then the daughter in law goes to the house of her parents along with her children and stays there for months & years together.

    Now the divorce is also not an option as the woman has done family planning and has 3 children.

    Now since this is a dysfunctional marriage and it has led to greater responsibilities on the shoulders of the Parents and brother of the woman as she usually resides in their house now along with children. The woman also doesn’t contribute much in the house of his parents.

    Kindly suggest some solutions regarding this issue?

    Also on a seperate note is it desirable for the woman to contribute to her in-laws financially when she is residing in thier house?

    What are the solutions to make the marriage workable?

    Dr. Irfan Shahzad replied 1 year, 8 months ago 3 Members · 3 Replies
  • 3 Replies
  • Dysfunctional Marriage In This Case And The Solution?

  • Umer

    Moderator April 4, 2023 at 2:03 pm

    If you are seeking direct scholarly counsel, then in addition to getting insight from Dr. Irfan Shahzad Sahab ( @Irfan76 ), please also contact Hassan Ilyas Sahab, whose number I have sent you in a private message.

  • Dr. Irfan Shahzad

    Scholar April 4, 2023 at 10:28 pm

    In such cases, the elders of the families of husband and wife or any reliable arbitrators like union counsel should sit together to find a solution. They know the ground realities better with more details.

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