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Making Own Terms In Nikah: Woman As Head Of Family
To what extent can we change the nikah? For example can we go against the Quran’s general assumption and make the woman the head of the house?
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9 Replies
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Making Own Terms In Nikah: Woman As Head Of Family
updated 2 years, 2 months ago
3 Members
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9
Replies
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The Haqeeqat (reality/spirit) of Nikah cannot be changed which was discussed here:
Discussion 33305 • Reply 33607
Other than that, every term and condition can be put in place as long as it does not affect the Haqeeqat of Nikah.
Please see this from 5:06 to 12:48
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So does women being the head go against the fundamental spirit of the nikah?
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I do not think so. Somethings in Quran, in my opinion are advice, not a hard or strict rules that may earn serious sins. Although going against Quran’s advice usually puts people in big trouble and they find out when it is too late to correct.
Being head of household seems to be an advice. I think as long as there is nothing in Nikah contract that is against fundamentals of Islam, it is ok. It is a contract. I also sincerely think that woman side of family in Pakistan need to pay special attention to include reasonable amount in case marriage ends in Talak. Mostly they state minimum amount and that is a scam against women. I think the amount should be proportional to earned assets after the marriage and earning level of the husband and number of years of marriage at the time of Talak.
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For answer, please refer to the link below from 14:24 to 21:48
Summary of Response:
God has made male the head of household based on human nature, it is an expression of a reality, not some suggestion. But in cases, where a male decides to not earn for the family and a woman decides to earn for them instead, it will make woman a defacto head of the family. It is not recommended, but such a situation may arise. And Prophet (sws) said that whatever terms and conditions a couple decides at the time of their nikah, they are the ones that all parties should uphold at all costs. And when they do decide that in a rare situation, then a woman will be “Qawwam” and she will be held accountable if she doesn’t provide for her family and her husband. With becoming a “Qawwam”, there are some serious responsibilites that ensue and a woman then should be ready to face those consequences in case she fails to fulfil her responsibilities.
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Brother Umer, What I meant by the use of word “suggestion” is that it is not a sin to have another arrangement for being wife as a head of a household. It may not be optimum arrangement, but still not a Fard imposed by Allah. In such case doesn’t it become recommendation?
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You’re right Nadeem Sahab,
It is a recommendation by Allah in accordance with nature of man and woman in general.
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Please also refer to the following response of Ghamidi Sahab:
Discussion 35593 • Reply 35875
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Please also refer to the video below from 1:17:54 to 1:19:23
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Please also refer to the video below from 54:43 to 59:25
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Please also refer to the video below from 27:55 to 30:29
Sponsor Ask Ghamidi
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