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Living Abroad With Husband And Kids
Hi Guys,
I wanted some advice from this amazing community.
I have been living with my husband , away from my home land since we got married. First we were in Dubai, now it has been 6 yrs in Australia.
I have tried and tried very hard to adjust away from home. Yes, living in Australia has a lot of perks but being the first generation without any help gets hard. I am feeling like I am losing my self.
There are no other issues in my marriage alhumdullilah. But my husband has no plan to move back to Pakistan.
I have a lot of aspirations in life but I am hardly able to pursue them coz of no help.
My husband spent 3 years completing his mba with his job, and it was superrrr hard, yet I supported him thru out.
But now I feel I need time for myself too, which I will never get living here without any help. Coz my husband can only help so much with his job.
What should I do? Sometimes I get the urge to get a divorce if my husband is not ready to look at my want of moving back and if my whole life is just going to be wasted catering to everyone else’s needs.
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1 Reply
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Living Abroad With Husband And Kids
updated 3 years, 1 month ago
2 Members
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If I may pitch in my opinion and experience.
1. First approach is to understand that we are here in this World to pass a test. Then decide what actions would help you pass the test and return successfully to Allah.
2. Without disregarding your needs and feelings, thank Allah for everything that perhaps billions of people aspire for… being able to travel the World, see various cultures and having a spouse with no issues.
3. Understand that after marriage family needs take priority over ndividual needs. What your husband achived with your support will help improve living of the entire immediate and extended family. Im marriage a person’s actions impact many other people. Although individual sacrifice may seem unfair, but it is a grand act and perhaps happiness for many. This does not mean let go of your dreams. Discuss those dreams with your spouse and sometimes there are more than one solution to a problem. See if you can find an alternative solution.
Also myself being away from my country most of my life, sometimes the grass seems greener on the other side. That means it is possible that if you go back you are hit by reality and you either find home country not to be the same or once you practically live there long term, you find difficulties that you never imagined.
Anyhow, divorce seems extreme thought. Could it be home sickness or depression? Even before divorce take a break from your family life with your husband and spend several months away in home country. This may give you a different perspective and renew your relationships.
Also in those months try pursuing your passion and see if reality is the same as you thought.
Finally if nothing works, both sides should consult a wise and sincere person from each side to explore solutions.
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